Recognise that mistakes are helpful

If you make a mistake and put it right, you remember the lesson much more than getting everything right first time.

Recognise that self-belief can be learned

When you were asked as a small child what you wanted to do when you grew up, you could do anything!  Doctor, astronaut, teacher, firefighter – anything!  Try to put aside the restrictions you have placed on yourself and work out why they are there.

Set ambitious but realistic goals

The key word here is ‘realistic’.  If you try to achieve too much in one go, you are far less likely to succeed, reinforcing the idea that you are a failure and further knocking your self-belief.  Work out your ultimate goal – for example, to become an AAT Member in Practice.  Then set a series of smaller goals or targets that will lead you to your final big goal.  For example, enrol on Level 2 course, pass my Bookkeeping Transactions with a grade of at least 90%.  Each small goal is just as important as your final goal but should be easier to achieve.  Don’t be afraid to review and change your goals.  Perhaps you decide that instead of becoming a member in practice, you want to go on to become a chartered accountant.  Great, but don’t forget to keep setting lots of small but ambitious  targets to get you to your new end point.

Recognise your achievements

Don’t be afraid to be proud of your strengths.  If you are good at something, recognise it in yourself.  Equally, identify your weaknesses and think about how you can improve them.  If you achieve something, celebrate it.  Passing an AAT exam is a big deal.  The vast majority of the population is in awe of anyone who understands finance and you have proved that you do!  So reward yourself (chocolate ice-cream works for me!)

Stop comparing yourself to others

We have all met people who seem to be good at everything, those who sail through life passing exams with just 10 minutes revision, winning the 100 metres in the school sports day, getting a First at university.  If you try to compare yourself to them, you will just end up feeling bad about yourself.  So don’t compare yourself to others, compare yourself to yourself.  What can you do now that you couldn’t do a year ago?  I recently had a go at knitting a lace scarf for the first time.  I found the easiest pattern I could, but lace is difficult to knit and I had to undo it several times.  In the end I got there, having learned a lot about how to knit lace from the repeated undoing (see first point above).  I can now do something that I couldn’t do a year ago.  What about you?

Build your skills

To succeed in life we need skills.  These will include skills gained from learning, such as an AAT qualification and personal, or ‘soft’ skills, such as the ability to communicate clearly on the phone.  Try to identify the skills you need now and think you will need in the future and then work at strengthening the weaker skills.  Strong skills will increase your confidence and self-belief, building your skills through your career and life.

The lesson I learned from Millie all those years ago was, never under-estimate students and never  make assumptions about their future success, or lack of it.  We all learn in different ways, at different paces, and with different obstacles in our way.  Having self- belief allows us to overcome obstacles, allowing us to unlock those chains round our ankles and finally achieving our full potential.